DAY 15 - OWWWW

Today, I went to a hot yoga class, and REALLY understood how much work still has yet to be done. In plain terms, the class kicked my butt.

I consider myself fairly flexible with a standard degree of strength. I clued into how wrong I was when the 50 year old lady next to me was able to do a full side plank in a 90+ degree room and I was having a hard time doing the modified version.

Although the class was painful on a multitude of levels (it ranked pretty high for both physical pain and humiliation), I did finally tap into something that has been bothering me for awhile. This whole "getting in shape" thing isn't going to be easy at all: it's going to be very difficult, hard to maintain, and involve a lot of pain and exertion. I still have to do so much to change my diet, I need to change my pre-existing spending patterns, and I have to start doing things more often that help me destress. This entire class I was mulling over my finances, instead of actually enjoying the moment. What good did the mulling do? Absolutely nothing. If anything, it detracted from my actual practice.

It occurs to me that it's not just going to be my body that's getting a makeover, but also my mental state. I'm really not as happy, grounded, or centred as I'd like to be right now, and I do really need to change that. I have started by eating a heck of a lot healthier; more fruits, vegetables, and lots of vitamins in the morning...but there's still a ways to go until I see the results. If anything, I am now more determined than ever to make it happen.